He expects that I should be appreciative that he follows me around but it is stiffing me and I just want to be alone - and I have mentioned that more than 10 times or so. When I say I want to go alone, he scolds me for leaving him out of things. Like when I just want to go to the damn bookstore to study and he doesn't even appreciate books. Or when I join dance and have dance activities, and all he says is "why are you dancing so much?" and it's like - I don't mock you for playing card games, who are you to mock me for dancing? I don't mock you for going to the gym so who are you to stop me from going to dance - and all for what? For your satisfaction that I am rotting back at home doing nothing.
And the thing is, not even my parents know my schedule this tightly. If you ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, who knows - I fit my schedule as according to my mood. Growing up in an environment where my parents don't ask "How is school today?", and suddenly having to answer "How was your test today? How was dance tryouts today? What did you do today?" just isn't what I do (basically my parent's wouldn't even know there was a test, nor a tryout and they just don't ask. Sounds sad, yes, but I have grown up with this amount of freedom to do what I like to, and now having to answer to these questions feels like I'm answerable to things I do as a hobby.) The thing is if I claimed that I have nothing on tomorrow, and then I decide to go out after that, suddenly I'm the bad one because I claim to not be doing anything then.
I like to do things alone because I feel like I can do whatever I want to whenever I want to. Like yesterday, when we were supposed to go downtown, I had wanted to go alone, but he wanted to come along and because of that, I wasted like 2 hours just waiting for his class to end because my own class ended at 10am when his ends at 12pm. Or when we had to find something to eat and we couldn't decide because we had to take the other person into consideration.
And the thing is, not even my parents know my schedule this tightly. If you ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, who knows - I fit my schedule as according to my mood. Growing up in an environment where my parents don't ask "How is school today?", and suddenly having to answer "How was your test today? How was dance tryouts today? What did you do today?" just isn't what I do (basically my parent's wouldn't even know there was a test, nor a tryout and they just don't ask. Sounds sad, yes, but I have grown up with this amount of freedom to do what I like to, and now having to answer to these questions feels like I'm answerable to things I do as a hobby.) The thing is if I claimed that I have nothing on tomorrow, and then I decide to go out after that, suddenly I'm the bad one because I claim to not be doing anything then.
People have their own opinions and thinking, but I don't like it when people are so judgmental just because others don't do it 'their' way. This isn't the first time I called him out on being judgmental, and I doubt it's going to be the last either.
Labels: rant, things I can't stand
Obviously in construction at the moment... or maybe forever because I'm lazy like this ;)
Visit Montana, Yellowstone National Park